Updates

We're getting ready to do our first unneccessary post-placement visit on Monday (can you sense my frustration). Dan went down to the court last week to see why the confusion. The woman who usually deals with adoption related matters has been out on medical leave for quite some time. I've been dealing with a gentleman who I have found to be intrusive, not at all knowledgable, and just plain frustrating. Dan got to speak with the lady who was very knowledgable, and kind. She led him through the paperwork (the correct paperwork this time). She also informed us that even if we got an attorney, the process would still be lengthy.

At the same time, I spoke to a lawyer who was very familiar with Indian adoptions specifically। I expressed that I was surprised and disappointed that there was such a wait and process at this point. She told me that our county is certainly the most "oh, let's use the word dilligent." Great. Slow judge in India, slow judge in Maine. The other thing that she mentioned was that usually she completes all of the paperwork and files it as soon as the family comes home. Then she just hands in the post-placement reports as they come, so no time is wasted. We were under the impression that we couldn't file anything until the initial 6 months had passed.

We had really expected to get much more support with the court process than we have. I guess I had high expectations, and this is one area that we will reconsider when we do this again. I take full responsibility for the decisions in this area, and don't feel I can say much more, but my decisions in this area were not based on the research I did on other areas of our process. Next time it will be.

The woman with the probate court said that right now there are only three cases in the judge's drawer right now. However, we have to have our fingerprints done, and oddly, it takes 2-4 weeks for them to get the cards that we need to make the appointment. This makes no sense to me. After that, we need to wait for our fingerprints to clear, and then we can get an appointment with the judge. After this meeting, he will set a court date. We made it very clear that we are very flexible and can come in with an hours notice. So who knows.

The other update I wanted to provide was on my friend। Thank you to everyone who sent prayers, positive energy and other well wishes. Casey was on her way from one of our offices to the main office to drop off paperwork when she was struck head on by a man going North in the Southbound lane of the interstate. She had no time at all to respond. She had a brain injury and many broken bones, compound fractures to her legs. It was very scary for the first week, and she was kept in a coma. She is now awake, recognizing folks, has a sense of humor (which is so important for her :) So we are very glad to see her recovering so quickly, and it has been such a joy to get to know her family. We can't wait to have her back at work!

OK, here are some of the recent pics. Myles' eyes are so gorgeous in some of these. He is truly so sweet and sensitive.

How do you choose which country you will adopt from? I think each family has a unique story as to how and why they made their decision.

For us, we initially considered domestic adoption, but it somehow felt competitive to us. We didn't want to be in a pool with others, selling ourselves. It just didn't feel like the right way to go for us.

We are not from a diverse community and wanted to have at least some connection to our child's birth country. My sister had recently travelled to India to volunteer at an orphanage. We fell in love with the pictures she was sending back of the people, especially the children. In addition to this, she had many friends from India that we hoped would be resources as we began the journey.

As we were completing our dossier for India, our local home study agency called with a unique situation. While they usually had long waiting lists for domestic infants, at the moment they had a baby and no families to match it with. We were offered the opportunity to complete a profile for the birth mother to review. We initially said yes. It seemed easier, faster, and it made sense in our heads. I couldn't sleep that night. It just didn't feel right to me. I talked to Dan about it the next day and we both agreed. Our baby was in India. This baby was more convenient, but it wasn't ours. We were sure that India was the right path.

The epilogue to that story is that the birth mother of the little boy offered to us decided to parent her child and is doing very well. Although we didn't have strong preferences to begin with, once on the journey we knew where our child was.

For a while this has been a general family blog, and I plan on continuing with that. Adopting Max Rup has really connected us to an amazing community and turned us into those people that want to shout about how wonderful adoption is - for the children and for the families they join. If you're not familiar with the Red Letter Campaign, please take time to visit their website at http://www.redletterscampaign.com/

So in addition to the continued family updates, I'll also be participating in their adoption journal blogs. A way to give back to a community that has given us so much over that past few years.

Father's Day Recital

So, it's Father's Day. We didn't have the chance to do anything big and special, but I hope Daniel knows how very special he is to us. My kids are so lucky to have a Daddy that is patient, kind, honest, and isn't afraid to interact with them, be silly with them, and show lots of affection. I am so lucky to have these same qualities in the man I get to spend the rest of my life with.

Maddie and Auri had their first dance recital today. They were on either end of the group since they were the leaders. They looked absolutely adorable in their cowgirl outfits.

Quote of the day: A conversation between Madeline and Michael, a little boy in her class that also has a small farm.. .

Michael: "Hey, Maddie, it's almost time to shoot my cow and eat him."

Maddie: "Oh, yeah, and cows make good steaks, don't they Michael."

Great conversation for a dance recital.
The kids are very glad that summer is here. As usual, we're spending lots of time at the lake, swimming and turtle hunting. Myles loved this little guy. Not to worry - we always bring them home to their Mommies.
Above is Max's attempt at making friends at the LopHop. Thomas wasn't in the mood for sharing. :)

We're having a bit of difficulty getting the adoption finalized. We have to do this within our county, and thus far the folks at the court haven't instilled a bunch of confidence that they know what they're doing. We were hoping to not have to pay attorney fees for this, since it is supposed to be "the easy part" of the process. Dan is going down to the court tomorrow, and if he can't get it straightened out, we're hiring one. I just want him to be ours, and I'm sick of fighting with people at every turn. We were given the wrong paperwork and now they are saying it will be December before we should expect a court date. That's more than a year after we got him home! Everyone keeps saying "no big deal, he's home with you," which is true for the most part, but there is other stuff. We can't get our tax credit until we finalize - HUGE chunk of money that we are counting on. And until we finalize and get that money back, it isn't feasible to consider the next adoption, which is clearly in my heart already.

So that's the update. Keep the prayers coming for my friend, Casey. She is improving steadily, and we're so happy for each update we get from her lovely family.

Prayers, Please

Asking for prayers and lots of positive energy for a friend and co-worker critically injured in a car accident yesterday. She and her family are very strong people, so we have high hopes that she will recover. Thanks.

"We ask that you watch over those who are tonight in a coma, as their brains sleep in an attempt to heal. We ask that you watch over their loved ones, whose consciousness has been permanently altered by this sudden shock. We ask that you give help to those who have awakened, to have the energy and perception to address the process of rebuilding themselves. We ask that you give their loved ones the energy and hope, to enable them to stay as long as they can, to be the partner in the rebuilding and recovery."

Quite a Hodge Podge

My Aunt and loyal follower of this blog reminded me last night that I hadn't posted in a while. We've been quite busy with a few different events, so excuse my hodge podge of topics in no particular order :)

Myles turned 3 at the beginning of the month. We had a lovely, low key party at our house with, of course, a spiderman cake. He was such a cutie and is turning into such a sweet little boy. My sister, Jaime, always says he breaks her heart whenever he flashes his dimply grin. The other night we were at my folks house and he was "fixing" my hair. I asked him if he was making me beautiful, and he replied, "Mom, you aweady bewtiful." Awww. He's very polite and sensitive, unless he is in superhero mode, and then all bets are off!

That weekend we went to RI for my nephew's birthday at Monster Golf. It was dark, loud, and intense. My kids loved it for quite some time, but in the end got a bit overstimulated. I'm so glad that Grammie and Grampie were anxious to keep Max at the house until we got back.

We very much wish that Aunt Missy, Uncle Paul, Peter and Olivia lived a lot closer. The kids played so well together and we always have such a good time with them. As gas goes up and up, it is harder to make these trips as frequently as we would like.

On Mother's day we had a special treat. Since we were in RI anyway, we couldn't pass up the chance to meet another Dillon family, whose daughter shared a crib with Max while they were both in India. As much as we hoped the kiddos would recognize each other, I'm not sure that was the case. Even so, we had a lovely time with such a sweet family. The boys were so good with my kids, and the Mom was a gracious host, easy to talk to and share experiences with. We hope we will gather again whether in ME or RI.

This meeting also put Maddie into "When are you going back to get my baby sister" mode. Ph, patience my dear. We're still recovering from the last trip ;)

This long weekend is bitter sweet. Saturday we went to an event for folks from New England who have adopted from India. This lovely family in Auburn hosts it every year, and it gets a huge turnout. We went last year, right after we recieved Max Rup's referral. Maddie really latched onto the daughter of the host, and even wrapped a Christmas present for her last year. This year we saw very little of Maddie. As soon as we got there she was off with the other little girl and had a blast. She's getting so grown up :( All of us enjoyed the day tremendously.

Yesterday my whole family gathered at our house. We have a large, close-knit family and we truly enjoy being together. They are gathering again today at my parents house for the Memorial Day holiday, and I'll join them after work.

Yesterday was for a different reason. Last fall, my sister, Jaime, married a lovely gentleman. Last weekend Jaime became a nurse (first in her class by the way) and he (Tom) became a Doctor. We are very proud of both of them. This week they will move to VA. That's quite a haul with three kids in tow, so we realize that we will see much less of them. Both of them got the placements they wanted, and they are going to love their new town, I'm sure. But we will miss them terribly. My kids love Mimi and Uncle Tom, and Maddie has asked time and again why they can't just stay here. She's good at guilt trips.

So, we've been busy, had lots of fun, and cannot wait for summer to get here so school won't interfere with our outside fun. OH, and the baby chicks are in - always an exciting part of our year. Maddie plays mother hen and is out there holding them and talking to them morning noon and night. Max says chickie and likes to rub his face on their feathers. Very precious. I'll post pics of that soon.

Baptism

We had Max's baptism yesterday. One of the great things about a small community is that we got a private ceremony. Nice and quiet with just our family. We were so glad that all of Max's Labonte cousins could be here, and a good part of the Coombs gang. Myles was the coolest guy around, wearing his shades throughout the ceremony.

After we gathered at the house. It was absolutely gorgeous out, and the kids had a blast playing outside. Each time we have a gathering like this we are reminded of how very lucky we are to have such a cl0se-knit, enjoyable family.

As an addendum to my Papa's birthday post, we had a surprise party for him last week. It started out being a small gathering, but requests came in for invites, and there ended up being 118 people there. My cousin, Carrie (also Max's new Godmother), put together an amazing slide show that brought tears to everyone's eyes. Many people spoke of what an amazing man my grandfather has been to them. Not surprising, but so amazing to hear.

We have what is supposed to be our last post-placement visit on Tuesday, but apparently it takes 3 months to get a court date in our county, and Maine requires visits every other month until finalization, so we may have to do one or two more. We'll get there eventually.